How to move from stagnation to flow to create the life you’re craving

These past few months I've been behind the scenes birthing a few creations, healing, balancing, and learning to embody more of my inner wisdom.

…and it has been challenging.

Sometimes we go through periods where it feels like we’re getting nowhere. Nothing in our life seems to be progressing. It’s like no matter what we do, we can’t get closer to our desires. Maybe we don’t even know what we want, let alone how to get there.

So we feel STUCK.

It’s easy to get stuck in a cycle of feeling sad because we’re not being productive, and then not being productive because we’re feeling sad.

You see, for the last three months, I’ve been working on creating a new program, restructuring my offers, and writing marketing content.

Let me tell you, the process has been like pulling teeth. I thought it would take me a third of that time. But there were days when I couldn’t work on it at all. Either I had no motivation or I sat staring at my laptop struggling to translate the ideas in my brain into words.

Isn’t it ironic I was struggling to find my flow while creating a program about learning to flow? Maybe.

But I quickly saw it as an opportunity to put it all into action — to embody the wisdom I’ll be teaching and feel into the experience of transmuting stagnancy into flow, scarcity into abundance, and feeling lost into feeling secure in oneself.

Usually, we feel stuck in a rut when we are craving change but can’t seem to make it happen. We are not feeling fulfilled because we don’t know what to do, progress doesn’t seem to be happening fast enough if at all, or we don’t even know what would actually make us happy. It’s this feeling of despair that we so desperately want to get out of ASAP.

But that desire for change is an invitation to shift our reality into a higher one.

If we allow ourselves to move through the heaviness, we can initiate ourselves into a life that’s filled with joy, abundance, love, peace, and anything else our soul desires.

...and that's what the past few months have been for me -- an opportunity to shift my reality by shifting my vibration.

It has given me the time and space to reset and get back into my own flow. To move beyond the limits of what I think is possible and invite more ease into my life - through surrender and alignment.

So let me walk you through the cliff notes of this journey in the hopes that it inspires you next time you’re feeling stuck.

First, let’s talk about RESISTANCE. Because that feeling of being stuck? That’s where it stems from.

Resistance makes us self-sabotage. It keeps us stuck in loops of overthinking, negativity, limitation, and inaction. We resist what’s going on when circumstances are different than what we want or how we expect they should be.

But it's only when we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and let go of our preconceived notions about who we are and what we are capable of, that we can truly find our authentic selves.

When we let go of resistance to what is, we open up the possibility for miracles.

We can make choices from a place of love instead of fear. From this space, we can see that everything is happening for us, not to us. We can trust that the universe has our back and is conspiring to help us evolve and expand into our highest potential.

Radical acceptance of present circumstances

Instead of seeing a lack of movement as a rut we're stuck in, what if the answer was to simply embrace the stillness? To take time to be with the moment and see what it has to share?

It’s in the present moment that we can become aware of what’s coming up for us, what needs our attention, and what is in alignment with our highest good.

We can only access our wisdom, truth, and power when we are present.

We can only consciously create our reality in the now.

We can only intentionally shift our energy when we’re in the moment.

Getting caught up in the experiences of the past and anxieties of the future keeps us disconnected from our power to create.

It’s important to drop in and see what’s happening in the now so we can bring more awareness to our choices.

When we are able to accept our present circumstances, we can shift them. But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t strive for something better. It just means that in order to change our reality, we have to be okay with where we’re at first.

And the only way to do that is through radical acceptance.

How? By…

  • Grounding into our heart and body
  • Acknowledging our feelings without judgment
  • Breathing into uncomfortable sensations
  • Allowing ourselves to be vulnerable
  • Trusting that we can handle whatever comes up
  • Knowing that we are not our thoughts or emotions
  • Detaching from the outcome
  • Surrendering to what is
  • Practicing self-compassion
  • Holding space for ourselves
  • Being patient with the process

Learning to radically accept ourselves is a practice. It’s something we have to work on every day, in every moment.

Because the truth is that we are constantly changing and evolving. So it’s important to be gentle with ourselves and give ourselves permission to grow and change.

The more we can practice self-love and acceptance, the easier it will become to move through life with grace, ease, and flow.

Releasing resistance to the timing:

The thing is that progress is not linear — it ebbs and flows through different seasons. We can make the most out of the energy we’re in when we let go of resistance to the timing.

There are times for action and there are times for rest, for release, for planting seeds, and for harvesting the fruits of our labor.

Trying to push through and do more when we’re not in that space only drains our energy. It puts us out of alignment with the natural flow of our life.

It’s essential to get attuned to the cycles we’re in so we can work with them instead of against them. That might look like…

Resting when we’re tired instead of pushing through and burning ourselves out.

Slowing down when we’re feeling overwhelmed instead of trying to do more.

Allowing things to fall apart when they need to die off.

When we’re feeling stuck, this is a time for self-reflection and discovery. It’s an opportunity to get clear about who we are and what we want in life.

When I finally stopped trying to push things forward and embraced the energy of stillness, that’s when the real magic started unfolding. That’s when I realized that while on the outside it looked a bit stagnant, on the inside, my consciousness was expanding tremendously.

When we allow ourselves the space to do this inner work, we start to see changes in our outer world. We attract the people and experiences that are in alignment with our new vibration.

Letting go of urgency and scarcity

I did have days of flow. But then I would hit a wall of resistance and things would come to a stall again.

From my energy levels to external circumstances, it felt like everything was conspiring to force me to slow down. I didn’t want to. I was obsessed with the fact that the faster I finished, the faster I’d get to the money-making portion of the journey.

A scarcity mindset was keeping my energy scattered.

Sometimes we resist slowing down or sitting in stillness because we feel we don’t have enough — not enough time, money, support, success, love, etc. We have this conditioned belief that in order to get more, you have to do more — AND you have to do it NOW.

But slowing down actually helped me feel into what abundance means for me and create more balance in my life.

It’s not just about making more money. Abundance is so much more.

For me, it’s been about having more time to do the things I love, feeling comfortable in my own skin, nurturing healthy connections, exploring different hobbies and interests, and feeling a sense of ease in my everyday life.

Balancing being with doing

Part of my internal struggle was navigating my inner feminine’s desire to JUST BE and my masculine’s need for productivity.

When we’re feeling stuck, the initial instinct is to force ourselves to do more and try harder. Then when we don’t have the energy or motivation to do so, we judge ourselves for not doing better. We expect ourselves to be able to hunker down and push through.

In a culture where we’re conditioned to solve our problems with “do more” and “work harder”, it’s tremendously radical to embrace stillness.

We live in a fast-paced society overly focused on productivity and results. So much so that many of us gauge our sense of self-worth on how much we can get done. We fill our days with to-do lists and our calendars with plans. We wear busyness as a badge of honor.

But when we don’t allow ourselves time to recharge, we’re actually less productive. Working more does not necessarily equal accomplishing more.

In fact, resting is essential to our health and well-being. It’s during these times of stillness that we can connect with ourselves on a deeper level, refuel our creativity, and come up with innovative solutions.

Rest is just one part of this. A significant part of this journey, for me, has really been about learning to heal the relationship between the inner masculine and feminine.

Both masculine and feminine energies are essential to thriving. We need both in order to create a balanced, fulfilling life. When we tip too far to one side or the other, that’s when problems arise.

If we’re overly focused on doing, we can become stressed, burnt out, and disconnected from ourselves and our surroundings. On the other hand, if we spend too much time in a state of being, we can become lazy, complacent, and unfulfilled.

The key is to find a balance between the two. We'll dive deeper into the HOW in my next Love Note.

Shifting your focus

Whenever we're overly focused on one specific situation or goal, we can easily lose sight of the big picture. Imbalances in other areas of our life start popping up. Plus, the more we try to force things, the more we push away the things we want.

Whether we like it or not, waiting is simply part of the manifestation process. When things aren't unfolding in a tangible way, sometimes the best thing to do is focus on something else. Think of it as an opportunity to enjoy a different experience in the meantime.

Doing so allows us to return to the situation with fresh eyes and a new perspective. Oftentimes, all it takes is some space and time to allow things to fall into place.

We can't control everything. We can only do our part and let the universe handle the rest.

This doesn't mean giving up on our dreams. It just means that we have to trust the timing of our lives and know that everything will happen in perfect divine timing.

Another thing to remember is that sometimes things don't work out how we want because there is something better for us. So shifting our focus allows us to move in a different direction to bring our desires in the most aligned way possible, even if it looks completely unfamiliar to what we expected.

If we want more ease, joy, and flow in our lives, we simply have to learn to surrender to what is. This doesn't mean that we don't put effort into our goals. It just means that we focus on the process one step at a time, and trust that the outcome will take care of itself.

Embracing being in the dark

There’s something incredibly powerful about sitting in the darkness. It’s where we can go to heal our wounds, face our fears, and connect with our shadows. It’s a space of deep transformation.

But being in the dark means walking through the unknown. That can be difficult when our mind is constantly seeking certainty. The best way to learn to be ok with not having all the answers is to trust our intuition.

Intuition is our inner guidance system. It’s that quiet voice inside of us that knows what’s best for us--even when we can’t see the whole picture.

The more we listen to our intuition, the easier it becomes to trust the process of life. We start to realize that even though we can’t always see what's ahead, we can trust that everything is happening for our highest good.

Being in the dark also means facing the darker parts of ourselves. Often times when things feel hard or we’re facing challenges in our lives, it’s our shadow side that’s trying to get our attention.

Our shadows are the parts of ourselves that we tend to repress or ignore. They’re often the aspects of our personality that we’re not proud of or that make us feel uncomfortable. We tend to think of our shadows as negative, but they actually contain a wealth of wisdom and insight.

When we learn to work with our shadows constructively, we can access a great deal of power and creativity. However, if we ignore or repress them, it can lead to all sorts of problems including depression, anxiety, and addiction.

We want to hold on to the status quo because it’s comfortable and familiar. But in order to grow, we have to be open to letting go. Like removing weights off a hot air balloon, releasing old trauma, conditioning, beliefs, and stories naturally raises your vibration.

That means making a commitment to facing what's in front of us and not sweeping things under the rug -- no matter how uncomfortable it is.

There is great power in learning to get comfortable being in the dark. When we embrace our shadows, we open up the opportunity for expansion and growth. We can learn to use our darkness as a source of strength and insight.

How is this making me feel?

What am I resisting?

What is my highest truth?

A great start to shadow work is asking these questions whenever we're feeling triggered. Then exploring the insights that come through so we can learn how to make better choices.

Embodying a higher version of self

Being in the energy of stillness forced me to re-evaluate who I wanted to be and how I wanted to show up in all areas of my life. I used this time as an opportunity to get crystal clear on what I truly want.

My north star became aligning with my desires and values, not my ego’s beliefs on what is possible for me.

What kind of person did I want to be?

What kind of lifestyle did I want to live?

How do I want my relationships to feel?

How can I make sure my work is aligned with my highest good and serves others in a meaningful way?

Once I had clarity on what that looked like, it became obvious in what areas of my life I had to raise my standards, uphold better boundaries, create healthier habits, and nourish myself.

Slowing down gives us time to discern what's right for us and how we want to proceed.

We can get clear on our wants, needs, and boundaries. We can tune in to what feels good for us and what doesn't.

From this place of inner knowing, we can start making choices that are in alignment with our highest truth. We can start living a life that feels good to us -- not just one that looks good on paper.

Higher vibration living is about authenticity, not perfection. It’s about making progress, one step at a time. We don’t have to wait to start until we have everything figured out. We can begin right where we are.

The key is to become aware of the choices we’re making on a daily basis and how they’re impacting our life. Every choice we make either takes us closer to or further away from our dream life.

If we want to raise our vibration and live a life of joy, ease, and flow, we have to make choices that support that.

That might mean saying no to things that don’t feel good, even if they’re “supposed” to be good for us. It might mean saying yes to things that scare us. It might mean making changes in our lives that are long overdue.

But whatever it is, it starts with a choice. And the choice is always ours.

An invitation

These past few months have been an opportunity to embody the wisdom I desire to share, teach, and play with. To more deeply explore how we can get into our own flow and intentionally create the life we desire — especially when it feels challenging.

As I mentioned, I've been working on a group coaching program to help you step into your own flow and master your energy.

Being in your own flow helps you:

  • connect with the highest expression of you
  • remain resilient during times of chaos and uncertainty
  • manifest from a place of joy and ease
  • trust your intuition and inner guidance
  • cultivate fulfilling relationships and work that lights you up

Sacred Flow is a healing container that facilitates your release of everything that isn’t serving you, the balancing of your energy, and the intentional co-creation of your deepest desires.

The first round of the program begins on 10/25, the October New Moon. I hope you join us. [Learn More]

So to wrap it up...

When you are in a rut, instead of looking at it as a period of stagnation you have to get out of as soon as possible, see it as an initiation into a higher version of you.

There’s magic to experience when you allow yourself to go through this process of death and rebirth. The struggle happens when we resist it.

If you are feeling lost, confused, or stuck, know that this is a temporary phase. It is part of the process of becoming who you are meant to be. Birth brings growth and expansion – so trust that this is a good thing, even though it may not feel like it in the moment.

Remember, you are not stuck in a rut, you are birthing a new you. Allow yourself the time and space to go through it.

with love and magic,

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Hi, I'm Alegna

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